


Everything

by justsomebucky



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Car Accidents, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Hospitals, Injury, Major Character Injury, Mild Language, Temporary Amnesia, drunk driver mention, i'm not a damn doctor okay? shonda rhimes taught me this, motorcycle accident
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-10
Updated: 2017-11-10
Packaged: 2019-01-31 13:18:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,778
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12682692
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/justsomebucky/pseuds/justsomebucky
Summary: AU. Reader rushes to her ex-boyfriend’s side when he’s in an accident.





	Everything

**Author's Note:**

> For a writing challenge. My prompt was “I got into a car crash and you’re still my emergency contact even though you’re my ex.” Sorry if you got a notification from me more than once - it said 'failed' and then they magically appeared.

Phone calls are made for all sorts of reasons, even in the era of texting. They bring sad news, happy news, good news, and bad news…

There are also those sorts of calls that change your life, for better or worse. You were in a meeting with Tony Stark and Happy Hogan when you got that sort of call.

Naturally, you didn’t answer.

There were, of course, three valid reasons why you didn’t answer.

The first is that you were in the meeting and didn’t want to be disrespectful. You had just been promoted to Mr. Hogan’s team lead. It was a highly sought-after position since he was Mr. Stark’s top advisor. You weren’t sure it was exactly what you wanted to do, but it was a start.

The second reason was that you didn’t recognize the number. It was bad enough that you used caller ID to screen people you actually knew (even sometimes your family, which you were a little ashamed to admit). Why would you even bother with a total stranger?

The third was probably worst of all, but it was most applicable: you hated talking on the phone. You spent a lot of your time on a phone as it was for business purposes, so personal calls were put on the back-burner. Why call when you could text?

Why text when that person could just leave you alone, you know?

Anyway, you didn’t answer the first time. There was too much at stake during the meeting.

You had worked hard to get where you were. You’d sacrificed so much, you could finally relate to that girl in The Devil Wears Prada (though Happy and Tony were far nicer than her boss). There were missed appointments, disappointed family members at holiday gatherings, and of course the biggest hit to your life…The Breakup.

You were officially alone again, after a year-long relationship came crashing to the ground about six months ago.

Anyway.

The phone rang a second time when you were walking out of the boardroom with the official company timelines in your hands for the construction and completion of a new facility upstate.

You weren’t in charge of these ventures, but you had to be prepared in case Mr. Hogan became indisposed on some other project, which happened a lot at Stark Industries. If Mr. Stark ever had sudden inspiration for something, you better believe Mr. Hogan and Ms. Potts were right there with him, pulled away from everything else they were working on.

You wanted to be that person, too. You wanted the responsibility, the ‘in’ with Tony Stark…you wanted to be worthwhile to the company since you didn’t feel worthwhile anywhere else.

It wasn’t until you were in the quiet safety of your own office that you answered the call on the third attempt. Whoever it was, they were persistent.

You shrugged off your jacket, switching your phone to your other ear as you accepted the call. “Y/N speaking.”

“Hello, this is Dr. Palmer from Memorial Hospital. I’m sorry, I didn’t quite catch your name?”

Memorial Hospital? What the hell?

“It’s Y/N Y/L/N. How can I help you, Dr. Palmer?”

“Ms. Y/L/N, I’ve been trying to reach you because you are listed as the emergency contact for James Barnes. You do know him?”

You froze in your seat, eyes wide as you tried to digest what she just said. That was a name you’d been trying to forget.

“Ms. Y/L/N?”

“Please,” you said softly. “Call me Y/N. Is he…is James okay?”

“I don’t typically like to discuss emergency cases over the phone. I –“

“I get it, Doctor. I’ve been through this before. I’ll be there in five minutes.”

You pressed end on the call and stood up, grabbing the jacket you’d just placed on the back of your chair to fend off the chilly air.

Mr. Hogan’s secretary Maria looked up at you as you rushed past. “Where are you going? You have another meeting in three hours!”

“I know,” you called back. “It’s an emergency. I’ll be back!”

Her confused face is the last thing you saw before the elevator doors shut.

“Yes, hi, I’m looking for Dr. Palmer?” You leaned over the information desk in the emergency room, trying not to crawl over it and find the information yourself. You didn’t want to be rude, but you were in a freakin’ hurry.

“Which one?” a nurse whose name tag read Scott Lang asked you. “There’s actually several –“

You shook your head at him. “It was a woman in the ER! She took the case for my boyf- my friend James Barnes. Can you look it up that way?”

“Sure I can.” Scott typed for a second, then furrowed his brows at the computer. “I have a Barnes here, but he’s listed as being in the morgue…oh.” He looked up at you. “I don’t think I’m supposed to tell you that.”

You reeled at his words, taking a few steps back and feeling a little faint. Your limbs felt like jelly.

Was Bucky really…gone?

“Oh wait,” Scott continued, typing again. “That said Barnabes. Sorry, my fault. James Barnes has been moved to a private room on the third floor. You could probably find Dr. Palmer there.”

“Oh my god,” you shouted, seething with anger. A few people passing by stopped to stare at you, but you couldn’t help yourself right now. “You can’t just tell people that their loved ones are dead and then say ‘my fault!’”

“Look, lady, I’m sorry. This is my first day. I screwed up, okay? Please don’t tell my supervisor, I’ve got a kid at home,” Scott pleaded. “I really am sorry.”

It took a second or two, but you managed to get your breathing under control enough to speak at a normal volume. “Fine. What is the room number?”

“Three-ten.”

Your eyes narrowed slightly. “I won’t say anything, Mr. Lang. But please be a little more careful.”

Without another word, you turned on your heel and made your way to the third floor.

Nurses and doctors were rushing around, some with worry etched on their faces, and some laughing and joking with each other. How could so many different emotions be taking place in one building?

Babies were being born just as others were dying mere floors away. It was truly insane to think about.

You slowed down when you got close to his room, and as you peered in you realized no one was in there with him.

But Bucky…

He was laying there on the crisp white hospital sheets with about ten different wires and gadgets attached to him. You glanced up to the heart monitor, where the signal showed a steady, strong beat.

For that you were so very grateful.

You moved closer to the bed, careful not to disturb anything as your eyes raked over him. He had scrapes all over his face and arms, and butterfly bandages over several cuts on his chin and forehead.

“What happened to you?” you whispered, reaching out to brush a strand of his long brown hair back.

“He was in a motorcycle accident.”

Your hand recoiled as you looked up at Dr. Palmer. Either you’d been too focused on Bucky to notice her, or she was super stealthy.

“It’s nice to meet you, Y/N,” she said, reaching her hand out to shake yours.

You felt a little mortified at the fact that you still didn’t quite have full strength back from the little information desk episode. Your hand was clammy and shaking.

“Nice to meet you, too, Dr. Palmer.”

“Please, call me Christine.”

You nodded. “So, an accident? Is he okay?”

Christine flipped a page on the chart. “James is- “

“Bucky,” you interrupted. “He prefers to be called Bucky. It’s a, uh..it’s a nickname.”

“Bucky,” she repeated. “Okay, good to know. Bucky is asleep. We gave him some powerful painkillers after he complained of severe abdomen pain upon arriving at the ER. He’s got some lacerations, contusions, and three bruised ribs. He’s going to have limited mobility for a while. Little things like lifting heavy objects, reaching for things, and vigorous physical activities are not going to be possible until he heals a little.”

You nodded again. “But he’s okay? I mean, no permanent damage, no brain trauma, nothing like that?”

The doctor pressed her lips in a straight line while she glanced over more of the chart. “Actually, when the EMT asked him his name, he remembered, but he also got the date wrong. He thought it was six months ago.”

“Amnesia? Is it permanent?” The thought of Bucky forgetting any part of his life made you nauseated.

“It’s most likely temporary. I’ve seen it before, especially after a quick trauma like this. Could be hours, could be days…maybe more, but not likely. We’re going to have to wait until he wakes back up to determine if there’s any residual effects from a potential concussion.”

“Why would he be allowed to sleep if you thought there might be a concussion?” you asked, frowning at the doctor. “I’ve had them, and the first thing they told me was to not go to sleep.”

“And the first thing you did was?”

“Sleep,” you admitted.

Christine nodded. “The body knows how to heal itself in most cases, Y/N. We didn’t believe there was any major brain trauma when he was brought in, and his first scans showed no signs of swelling or bleeding. He had been wearing his helmet thankfully. So, we wait until he wakes up.”

“What exactly happened in the accident? In case he can’t remember but wants to know?”

“The police said a drunk driver ran a red light,” she explained. “They knocked him off his motorcycle onto the hood of their car. He’s lucky that was all. If he had landed on the pavement or been thrown elsewhere, we’d be discussing a situation way worse than this.”

“Oh my god.” Your eyes flickered back to Bucky’s sleeping form. “So with those injuries, how long will he be kept here?”

“Probably just overnight, to be honest.”

You took a deep breath, letting it out slowly as you tried to process all of this. Bucky could have died.

He could have died.

Christine started walking backwards toward the door. “I have other patients to see, but if you need me just press the call button.”

“Thank you.”

You grabbed one of the chairs from the corner and dragged it closer to the bed, sitting still for a moment while you stared at his face. The sound of him breathing with oxygen tubes up his nose was sort of weird. It reminded you of how deeply he used to sleep when he was beside you at night.

“Your hair’s longer,” you murmured, leaning forward. “And you need a shave, Buck.”

The realization that he could wake up at any second and find you here fawning over him made you a little bit uncomfortable, but when would you get another opportunity to say what you were thinking without him arguing back?

“I have no idea why you kept me on as your emergency contact. In fact, you probably forgot all about it. I don’t think you’d want me here…not after everything we said to each other. We argued about everything…money…schedules…we found a way to be angry. It wasn’t healthy.”

You sighed, shifting back in your seat a little as you let your eyes drift to the ceiling. “Maybe it’s for the best that we broke up. I only seemed to make you miserable.”

Little patterns of grey and white speckled the ceiling tiles. You hated that Bucky would wake up and the first thing he’d look at would be these ugly tiles. He should be home, safe in bed…not here.

“I know I put work first a lot. It’s dumb but…Bucky, you’re so successful, you know? You worked hard to get where you are and I didn’t want to be the one leeching from you. I wanted to establish myself…”

The whirring sound of the air being circulated was your only response.

This was actually really therapeutic for you. Maybe the two of you could have made it had you bothered to stop yelling and actually listen. You were just as much at fault about that as Bucky was.

Oh well.

“Was it worth it? I don’t know,” you answered truthfully, your voice catching a little. “I feel like the breakup made me wake up a little, you know? I feel like…it’s that old stupid saying, you don’t know what you’ve got till it’s gone.”

Being honest and vulnerable wasn’t really your thing. That’s probably why this was easier with Bucky asleep.

“I thought that working even more hours and distracting myself would help, but it hasn’t. I still love you, after all…I loved you then. I wanted to be with you. I assumed I was doing enough, and we broke up anyway.”

Good thing he was a heavy sleeper.

“I didn’t want to lose you. It’s my fault.” Your voice had gone down to a whisper again, eyes filling with tears as you finally said it out loud. The ugly ceiling tiles blurred into one big ugly blob. You blinked a few times, causing the tears to roll from your eyes down your cheeks, where you wiped them away quickly.

No one needed to see that.

“I guess, if I had to say something to you without you knowing, it would be that I’m sorry.”

“I’m sorry, too.”

Your eyes widened and you sat back up at the sound of Bucky’s soft, raspy voice. His eyes were still closed and his brow was furrowed.

“How long were you awake?” you asked, your tone more accusatory than you intended.

“Long enough.” Bucky’s blue-grey eyes struggled to open from his medicated haze. He blinked a few times, focusing on the awful wallpaper across from him, then shifted his gaze to you.

You wanted to hide from him. You felt stupid for assuming he was sleeping this whole time, stupid for revealing your deepest thoughts to the one person who should have heard them six months ago, long before the two of you ended things.

“Don’t. Don’t do that.”

“Do what?” Your leg started shaking involuntarily and you tried to shift to a more comfortable position, as if there was one. “I’m just sitting here.”

“Don’t go back in your little shell. I get that you- “

You watched with wide eyes as he grimaced in pain. “Should I get a nurse?”

Bucky turned his head slightly. “Not yet. Can I get- is there water?”

There was a little pink pitcher and plastic cup sitting on the table beside his head, so you stood up and poured a half-glass of water for him, holding it to his lips as he took a sip.

“Thank you.”

Since you were already up, maybe now was the time to exit. “They told me that you had to stay overnight, Buck, so I should probably go. I’ve got another meeting to get to, and I…” Your voice trailed off as you realized he was chuckling.

“Oh, Y/N.”

“Don’t do that. Your ribs are bruised.”

“It’s just too classic, Y/N. You running out on me for work. Give Mr. Stark my regards.”

Your mouth dropped open. “You want to do this here? Bucky, you nearly died today. I don’t want to fight.”

“Then sit down and finish telling me what you tried to when you thought I was asleep.”

The two of you had a stare down for a second, but you eventually relented, sitting back in the uncomfortable chair.

“What did you hear?” you asked again.

“That you didn’t want to lose me, and that you were sorry. But even the doctor said that I wasn’t really hurt, you know. You aren’t gonna lose me. Close call or not, I’m still kicking.”

He thought you meant lose him to death.

Well, that too, but…what a silly man.

“I didn’t mean lose you specifically today, though that would have been…let’s not even talk about that. I meant lose you back then, six months ago when we broke up. And I am sorry, by the way. I did mean that sincerely.”

Bucky looked confused. “What are you talking about? None of this makes sense…I thought I was the one who bumped my head?”

Dr. Palmer’s words about possible amnesia as a side effect of a concussion came back to you.

“Bucky, what is today’s date?”

He made a face at you. “They already asked me that in the ER. It’s May something. I was always bad with dates.”

“It’s November, Buck,” you murmured, frowning at him. “I need to find the doctor.”

Steve Rogers enveloped you in a big hug the second he laid eyes on you in the waiting room. “How’s Bucky?”

You pulled back, letting your arms fall to your sides. “He’s got some cuts and bruises…he bruised three ribs. He seems to have a concussion.”

“Wow, he got lucky,” he commented, leaning against the wall.

The two of you were standing outside the waiting room door, far enough out of earshot of Bucky’s room that you could discuss things freely.

You had to tell Steve the truth.

“The doctor said he’s got a bit of temporary amnesia.” You looked at Steve, concentrating on his bright, warm eyes to stop from crying again. “At least, they think it’s temporary.”

Steve’s face fell. “Oh, no. How long of a time frame has he forgotten?”

“Six months.”

Understanding flashed in his eyes. “So he doesn’t remember that the two of you broke up, does he?”

“No,” you whispered, looking down at your feet. “It could be from a concussion, could be from the meds they gave…a specialist is with him now.”

“How are you holding up, Y/N?”

You glanced back up at him. “I’m supposed to be back at work here in about twenty minutes. Do you think you could sit with him through dinner?”

“Sure, I don’t mind at all.”

“I’m surprised you weren’t his emergency contact.”

Steve gave you a look. “I’m not.”

When you didn’t reply, he kept talking.

“Y/N, Bucky never does anything without good reason. So that means there’s a good reason why he left you on the call list.”

“But we broke –“

“It doesn’t matter. That love doesn’t just disappear,” he told you gently, reaching up to brush an errant tear off your cheek. “He still had hope that the two of you would reconcile.”

You turned away from Steve, glancing down the hallway toward room three-ten. “Does it matter? If all we were was angry, does it matter?”

“I think it does. You both were hurt, and learning together how to be in a mature partnership. You’ve grown a lot since this, haven’t you?”

“I- I guess?”

Steve’s mouth lifted a little. “Come on. Give yourself some credit. You wouldn’t be here if you hadn’t, knowing full well that it could lead to something uncomfortable. You can’t tell that the thought of reconciling didn’t cross your mind, at least since you spoke with him?”

Well, when he put it that way…

“And Bucky’s grown, that I’m sure of,” he continued. “He’s tried to become better at listening. He’s working on himself, too.”

“That’s…that’s good.”

“It is.” Steve reached over and placed a hand on your shoulder. “He’ll remember eventually, and the two of you can talk it out at the very least. But you’re here, Y/N, and that says everything in my opinion.”

You nodded, pulling Steve in for another hug. “Why are you so smart all the time?”

“I’m just observant,” he replied, kissing the top of your head gently. He pulled back and gave you a little push down the hallway. “Now go to your meeting. We’ll be fine.”

Happy and Tony kept you longer than you expected, though Pepper was missing in action for the first half of the meeting.

When she walked in, the first thing she did was sit beside you and offer you a smile. There was something in her eyes that you’d never seen directed at you before, but you couldn’t quite place it.

“So Y/N, when do you think you can make the trip upstate?”

“The, uh…the trip?” You were confused; no one had ever mentioned you taking a work trip.

“Yes,” Happy said, sounding a little irritated. “It’s in the itinerary on your desk. I take it you never made it back to your office from your emergency?”

“I didn’t tell Maria to put it on her desk,” Pepper spoke up, pushing a file in front of you. “And she isn’t going upstate, Happy, that’s currently your job if I remember correctly. I was nosy and read over Y/N’s proposals from the beginning of the year, and I loved almost all of them. There are a few I want to get started on right away. She’d waste away on some construction site upstate.”

He looked completely baffled. “But –“

“No buts, you heard her,” Tony said, clearly enjoying himself. He grinned at Happy. “Better get packing, pal.”

Happy grumbled to himself the entire time from the chair, to the doorway, and all the way down the hall from what you could hear.

“So uh, what’s the word?”

Your eyes flitted back to Tony’s. “I’m sorry?”

“The person in the ER. He okay?”

Pepper gave you an apologetic smile. “I called to have flowers sent after Maria told me. She was worried about you. I’m really sorry, Y/N.”

You shrugged. “He’s not that bad off. Cuts and bruises, you know.”

“Oh, I know,” Tony said, glancing at Pepper.

“Tony’s been in a lot of accidents,” she told you, rubbing your back. “He seems to think he’s invincible.”

“Incredible is the word you’re looking for, darling.”

Pepper chose to ignore him. “Listen, we discussed it and we want you to take some time off. Go be with him until he’s well again.”

“But he’s…but what about –“

“Happy’s taking over the projects permanently, if that’s what you’re worried about,” Tony interrupted, pushing his glasses up his nose. “He’s going to be upstate for the remainder of the construction and development. I’m reassigning you to Pepper’s team, where your hours won’t be nearly as long because she’s a bleeding heart softy.”

What the what?

“That means I’m your new boss,” Pepper added, smirking at Tony before giving you a warm smile. “And I say take all the time you need. When you come back, we’re gonna start on some of the projects you had in mind, okay?”

Was this real life?

“Thank you.” You tried not to get too excited and emotional. “I can’t even begin to thank you both enough.”

“Actually, you can,” Tony countered, giving a little shrug. “By coming back and kicking some major ass.”

You were full-on grinning now. “That I can definitely do.”

Four hours had gone by. It had been four hours since you left Steve to sit with Bucky.

By the time you got back to the hospital, you felt like you had entered the Twilight Zone or something. Nothing was making sense, but you weren’t about to question your sudden good fortune at work.

And you weren’t about to squander this second chance they’d given you to make things right, even if it just meant repairing your friendship.

Steve was still sitting in the chair beside Bucky, though you could tell he was tired and wanted to leave.

“Go home to Nat,” you said, giving him a smile. “I’ve got this.”

He said goodnight to you both and took off, leaving you alone with your ex-boyfriend.

“So, while you were gone, a funny thing happened.” Bucky raised an eyebrow at you, as if waiting for you to guess.

You didn’t need more than one guess. With a knowing sigh, you flopped into that wonderfully uncomfortable chair once again. “Your memory came back?”

Bucky nodded. “Steve mentioned something to me that sounded familiar but not. Ever have that happen? Where you can practically feel the answer on the tip of your tongue but you aren’t quite there?”

“I guess?”

“Anyways, he brought up maybe asking Natasha to marry him. And I thought to myself, wait a minute…they just met, didn’t they? Turns out, they met about a year ago, halfway through our relationship.”

You waited for the hammer to fall.

Bucky looked down at his hands for a second. There was something in his palm, something he was turning over and over.

When he looked back up at you, he also held up the object.

It was a diamond ring.

“I’m confused,” you said, unable to tear your eyes away from the ring. “Is that for Natasha? Why do you have it?”

“Y/N, if this was truly six months ago like my brain tried to tell me, I’d have given you this by now.” He turned the ring a little so you could see it better. “They found it after the accident, still stuck in my wallet where I’ve been keeping it all this time.”

“What?” you whispered, feeling your own hands started to shake. This was all news to you.

Holy shit…what a mess.

“Yeah, I found it in this bag of my personal effects over there on the nightstand,” he said, nodding to the table where his water cup sat. “I stared at it for a minute. And after that, I remembered everything.”

Your eyes met his again, unsure of how to react.

“Say something,” he pleaded, lowering his hand and gripping the ring in his palm again.

“What do you want me to say, Bucky?” Your eyes filled with those damned tears again, something that happened more today than it had since the week you broke up. “I fucked up.”

“I fucked up, too, Y/N. We both had issues.”

You nodded, looking down while tears slipped off your chin and landed on your jeans.

“I feel like this is a second chance for us, though,” Bucky added in a softer tone. “Don’t you?”

This time when you met his gaze, and all the fight…the walls he put back up…all of it was gone. It was just Bucky, your Bucky, with a hopeful light in his eyes.

“Bucky,” you began, feeling your resolve slip a little. “We fought before. What makes you think we won’t now?”

“Maybe we just had to grow up a little.” The corner of his mouth lifted, and the hand not clutching the ring reached for yours.

You let him grasp your hand, giving his a little squeeze in return. “Maybe.”

“And you can’t tell me you didn’t miss me, Y/N. I mean, you rushed here, worried about me, and it wasn’t because we’re friends.”

“No,” you admitted, trying and failing to hide your own smile. “It wasn’t that.”

“So we try again. This time, we stop to listen to each other. This time we work things out before letting it escalate to anger and resentment. I’m guilty of it, too, and…well, if you wanted to try, I promise I’d try harder.”

“Can I ask you…why did you leave me on as your emergency contact?” You bit your lip, not sure if you wanted to know the answer.

He probably just forgot.

Bucky gave you a big smile. “You think I’d want Steve’s mug to be the first one I see after something like this?”

You rolled your eyes, smiling at his joke. Even when he was in pain, he was always trying to make someone else laugh.

His smile faded as he watched you. “No, seriously, Y/N. In a real emergency, I can’t think of anyone I’d want to be here with me more than you. And that…”

Now Bucky was blinking rapidly, trying to keep his composure. You didn’t need to hear the end of his sentence to understand his sentiment.

You stood and leaned over, giving him a gentle kiss on the lips.

That was everything.

That’s what Bucky had been about to say.

You understood, because that’s how you felt, too.

“Hold on to that ring, then,” you instructed, giving him a bright smile. “Because if we’re giving this another go, I’m not letting you get away this time.”

His eyes were mischievous again. “Did you learn how to get what you want from Tony Stark?“

“Pepper Potts, actually.”

You shut him up with another kiss.


End file.
